When I started this journey of becoming a foster parent I was faced with a choice. To work with the county department of children's services or to work with a private agency. See without question, I knew my answer. I am a social worker. I have worked for a neighboring county's children's service, I currently live and breath Medicaid and work closely with Job and Family services. I know the in's and outs of the system. I didn't need that additional advocate and red tape to get a child in my home. Boy was I wrong.
When I first started this process I was given a timeline of 3 months. 3 months!! My social worker said, since your classes will be done in March, we could have you licensed by April! I swear I had a heart attack. Fortunately (unfortunately now) I could not take CPR until June so I would have to wait 6 months. Whew. I could prepare myself for June. I got very excited for June. I was thrown a beautiful shower (more in another post about that) and was all ready to go for June. CPR happened and I was informed my social worker was out on emergency leave and I would have to call her supervisor. I was scared. I am 6 months into this journey and starting to panic that it is all going to fall apart. I called the supervisor who informed me that my social worker would be back in about a week and she will call me then. A week went by, nothing. Sent an email and got an auto-reply "I am out of the office until July 15, in an emergency contact my supervisor" (No contact information left for the supervisor mind you), so I call again. The supervisor responsed "I don't know what to tell you, you will just have to wait til she comes back." A little heart broken, I hang up the phone and decide to wait. It dawns on me, my social workers case load is not being covered, for 2 months! That irritation I began to feel started to subside because even when I am out for a week WITH coverage I come back to a trainwreck. I cannot imagine what this poor women is going to be coming back to from leave.
I wait it out until the middle of July and reach out to my social worker. She responds ready to jump back in. We set up our LAST visit. I am so geeked out. My last visit was completed at the end of July. She told me there was 1 person in front of me who needed to be completed first because it was an emergency placement and needed done in the next week. I think perfect! Take care of that family and kid because they deserve to have it all work out, then I am next. She told me, even if it didn't get completed in the next week that she had 30 days to get me licensed. Those days and weeks kept going by, with no word that my paperwork was submitted to the state. As my 30 days approached, I reached out. Crickets. No response. Finally a return email, an apology and ANOTHER LAST visit scheduled for September 1st. I talked with my social worker about the concerns I had about a quick placement and a family vacation coming up that I would love to take the kids on. She said she was working on getting everything together, her supervisor was reviewing my chart and she would have it sent in by next week. A breath of fresh air. I can feel it. It is so close. It is happening. A placement by the second weekend in September.
I follow up after the holiday, no response. I follow up on that Friday. No response.
I hit the frustrated point. The frustrated point of no more patients. I have lost the empathy I was feeling for the social worker. Daily, my support system asks me why I was not contacting her weekly (empowering female business professionals who know how to get things done mind you). My response was always the same, "She's overwhelmed, she's like me. The deadline is 30 days, I will follow up about day 28." Articles upon articles coming across social media, kids in the area being taken out of their home, "We need foster parents." REALLY, you NEED foster parents?? How about you license the Foster parents you have waiting on the sideline for 10 months! I am not becoming a foster parent to adopt that perfect race, age, size or healthy kid. If it happens, great, but I am here to provide a safe home for kids who need it. Whether it be for 12 hours or 12 years. That is what I am here to do. I don't care race, age (to an extent for my first placement- after that game on!) OR health issues. There are kids in our county who need a safe place to sleep tonight and you are dragging your feet on a good home with 2 beds!
So I hit that point- as much as I wish I could have sent the above paragraph to my social workers supervisor, I didn't. I was factual and straight to the point. Instead of a supervisor calling me or responding, she just forwarded the email to my social worker who responded in a very defensive email back. I am at a loss. Who is supposed to be my advocate right now? Who is supposed to be the person who says, this girl has been done with her classes for over 3 months, she has been working with our agency for over 9 months, references for her were not sent out until 1 week ago (that she had to follow up on and ensure they were completed), she has 2 open beds in a county which has kids flooding into custody, why the hell is she not licensed yet? Because what I learned today, that advocate can't be yourself, because you come off as not understanding the inter workings of children's services.
Today as I reflect on my licensing journey, that still isn't over. I wish I would have done more research on ALL foster care agencies before deciding to go with the county.
When I first started this process I was given a timeline of 3 months. 3 months!! My social worker said, since your classes will be done in March, we could have you licensed by April! I swear I had a heart attack. Fortunately (unfortunately now) I could not take CPR until June so I would have to wait 6 months. Whew. I could prepare myself for June. I got very excited for June. I was thrown a beautiful shower (more in another post about that) and was all ready to go for June. CPR happened and I was informed my social worker was out on emergency leave and I would have to call her supervisor. I was scared. I am 6 months into this journey and starting to panic that it is all going to fall apart. I called the supervisor who informed me that my social worker would be back in about a week and she will call me then. A week went by, nothing. Sent an email and got an auto-reply "I am out of the office until July 15, in an emergency contact my supervisor" (No contact information left for the supervisor mind you), so I call again. The supervisor responsed "I don't know what to tell you, you will just have to wait til she comes back." A little heart broken, I hang up the phone and decide to wait. It dawns on me, my social workers case load is not being covered, for 2 months! That irritation I began to feel started to subside because even when I am out for a week WITH coverage I come back to a trainwreck. I cannot imagine what this poor women is going to be coming back to from leave.
I wait it out until the middle of July and reach out to my social worker. She responds ready to jump back in. We set up our LAST visit. I am so geeked out. My last visit was completed at the end of July. She told me there was 1 person in front of me who needed to be completed first because it was an emergency placement and needed done in the next week. I think perfect! Take care of that family and kid because they deserve to have it all work out, then I am next. She told me, even if it didn't get completed in the next week that she had 30 days to get me licensed. Those days and weeks kept going by, with no word that my paperwork was submitted to the state. As my 30 days approached, I reached out. Crickets. No response. Finally a return email, an apology and ANOTHER LAST visit scheduled for September 1st. I talked with my social worker about the concerns I had about a quick placement and a family vacation coming up that I would love to take the kids on. She said she was working on getting everything together, her supervisor was reviewing my chart and she would have it sent in by next week. A breath of fresh air. I can feel it. It is so close. It is happening. A placement by the second weekend in September.
I follow up after the holiday, no response. I follow up on that Friday. No response.
I hit the frustrated point. The frustrated point of no more patients. I have lost the empathy I was feeling for the social worker. Daily, my support system asks me why I was not contacting her weekly (empowering female business professionals who know how to get things done mind you). My response was always the same, "She's overwhelmed, she's like me. The deadline is 30 days, I will follow up about day 28." Articles upon articles coming across social media, kids in the area being taken out of their home, "We need foster parents." REALLY, you NEED foster parents?? How about you license the Foster parents you have waiting on the sideline for 10 months! I am not becoming a foster parent to adopt that perfect race, age, size or healthy kid. If it happens, great, but I am here to provide a safe home for kids who need it. Whether it be for 12 hours or 12 years. That is what I am here to do. I don't care race, age (to an extent for my first placement- after that game on!) OR health issues. There are kids in our county who need a safe place to sleep tonight and you are dragging your feet on a good home with 2 beds!
So I hit that point- as much as I wish I could have sent the above paragraph to my social workers supervisor, I didn't. I was factual and straight to the point. Instead of a supervisor calling me or responding, she just forwarded the email to my social worker who responded in a very defensive email back. I am at a loss. Who is supposed to be my advocate right now? Who is supposed to be the person who says, this girl has been done with her classes for over 3 months, she has been working with our agency for over 9 months, references for her were not sent out until 1 week ago (that she had to follow up on and ensure they were completed), she has 2 open beds in a county which has kids flooding into custody, why the hell is she not licensed yet? Because what I learned today, that advocate can't be yourself, because you come off as not understanding the inter workings of children's services.
Today as I reflect on my licensing journey, that still isn't over. I wish I would have done more research on ALL foster care agencies before deciding to go with the county.
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